5 Ways to Get Closer to Your Mate

The dynamics of a romantic relationship can be complex, and maintaining closeness requires intentional efforts. In this detailed guide, we delve into five expert-recommended strategies for fostering intimacy with your partner. By exploring each point thoroughly, you’ll gain insights into building a strong and satisfying connection.

Active Listening with Undivided Attention

Listening is more than just hearing words; it’s a profound way to reduce conflicts, enhance trust, and enrich your partnership. Genuine listening involves turning off distractions, offering undivided attention, making eye contact, and actively following up on conversations. This skill is especially crucial when your partner expresses distress, as attentive listening increases understanding and facilitates effective problem-solving.

Accentuating the Positives

Over time, relationships may shift focus from positive attributes to negative aspects, leading to dissatisfaction. Psychologist Kate Wachs advises conscious efforts to concentrate on your partner’s admirable qualities. By recognizing and appreciating these positives, you contribute to a more favorable relationship. Make it a practice to acknowledge your partner’s strengths regularly, fostering an atmosphere of appreciation.

Eliminating Nagging

Nagging tends to create tension and often proves ineffective. Instead of repetitively pointing out what you dislike, psychologists recommend engaging in a constructive dialogue. Wachs suggests expressing preferences and offering alternatives rather than dwelling on negatives. Balancing criticisms with positive feedback helps maintain harmony and encourages a more receptive response from your partner.

Quality Time Together

Scheduling dedicated “couple time” reinforces commitment and strengthens your bond. Clinical psychologist Peter A. Wish emphasizes the importance of making these moments exclusive to the couple. However, daily interactions are equally vital. Take a few minutes each day to connect, particularly during key moments such as mornings, evenings, and bedtime. Focusing on positive discussions during these times leaves a lasting impression.

Welcoming your partner warmly at the end of the workday is a simple yet impactful gesture. Interrupt your tasks, show genuine interest, and make your partner feel valued. This small investment can significantly contribute to sustaining intimacy.

Emphasizing Physical Touch

Physical touch is a powerful form of communication that complements emotional connection. Psychologist Kate Wachs encourages intentional physical contact throughout the day, such as hugs and kisses, to alleviate tension and convey care. Consistent physical intimacy, including shared sleep, can strengthen the emotional bond between partners and contribute to a positive relationship dynamic.


Building and maintaining intimacy in a relationship requires mindfulness and intentional actions. By actively listening, emphasizing positives, avoiding nagging, spending quality time together, and incorporating physical touch, couples can create a foundation for a lasting and fulfilling connection. These expert-recommended strategies, when applied consistently, contribute to the longevity and richness of romantic relationships.

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